Talk to the person in front of the mirror

And the time for you, when?

You stop for a moment.

You drop what you are doing and help the rest.

You give advice away and insist that they must apply them.

But, do you do the same with you? Do you advise yourself? Do you listen to yourself?

Everything seems to be about helping others, which, in concept, is fine. Everyone needs a hand at some point.

And that’s is one of the most important things that all of us should do. Altruistically. Without asking anything in return. Because, one day, you will need it too.

However, do you lend a hand to yourself when you need it?

Most likely not. Or probably, you do. Or maybe you didn’t even think about it.

In reality, you may be asking yourself how one can help themselves. Or how to be able to unfold and adopt both the role of adviser and advisee at the same time. Within the same person.

Let say that the opposite is to empty your mind.

Imagine this: a completely blank canvas hanging from a white wall.

When you have it, think immediately of the complete opposite: a canvas full of colours hanging from the same wall.

Same components, different set-up. All those colours are a herd of thoughts that come together minute after minute to your head. And they can produce that feeling of agony or drowning. All that entanglement doesn’t let you see the main problem clearly. Everything is chaos.

But think quickly. What colour catches your eye first?

Visualize it. Focus on it. That’s now your target.

However, what does that mean? Why did that get your attention?

That something requires a bit of action from you. It requires your help. Move from being a plain observer to an upper layer.

Pose the question. Maybe, the most difficult part. Because you can’t give it an answer. Because you don’t know how to stay away from it and stop being subjective.

Can we be not subjective when it is about ourselves? After all, we seek our personal well-being and we must be selfish.

Isn’t the subjectivity completely bound to the own “self”?

To make it clear, when we give advice to the rest, turns out to be simpler to be objective. It becomes easy to understand the situation, extract the key, analyze it and propose a solution.

That answer.

Instant or not.

Valid or not.

Coherent or not.

But objective. That’s for sure.

We can be personally more or less attached to the situation that we have in front of us, based on the emotional link that binds us to the person we are trying to help. And, why not say it, based on our own interests. If the situation affects us directly or not. Therefore, the level of objectivity will be bigger or smaller on a case per case basis.

Are there different levels of objectivity? Isn’t it, in fact, the loss of objectivity the cause of the subjectivity?

Then, we realize that when third parties are involved, we can play with two levers: objectivity and subjectivity.

However, let’s remove third parties.

When it is about the own “self”, do we have the luxury of being able to be objective?

Most likely, when we start assessing and analyzing the situation that we want to act upon, our own subconscious will pursue what is best for ourselves. That advice.

And that is completely fine. In fact, that’s the goal. Trying to help (yourself).

But, would it be the same advice for others than for yourself?

Interesting vicious circle.

It is possible if you are honest and your values are stronger than the potential short term profit. If you are willing to say ugly things to yourself. And, most importantly, if you are willing to listen to them.

If you are committed and you want to talk to the person in front of the mirror.

Because helping others is good.

But being able to help yourself is wonderful.